Gather round, fellow Amazon warriors, for today we witness another soldier escape the clutches of Amazon’s iron-fisted marketplace. The forum post titled “Freedom at Last! Goodbye awful, awful Amazon” from user tensquaremusic reads like a love letter to a toxic relationship, one filled with broken promises, unnecessary fees, and soul-sucking bureaucracy. And spoiler alert: they’re finally walking away. Let’s break it down.
After nearly 20 years of selling CDs and books—oh, and building up a minor empire under the stairs—tensquaremusic was gently informed by Amazon that selling their own pristine books and shrink-wrapped CDs makes them a full-fledged business. Yup, just like that, they’ve been promoted from hobbyist to “CEO of I-Just-Wanted-to-Sell-My-Stuff-Without-a-Headache, Inc.”
Amazon, in all its wisdom, declared that listing anything as “new” means tensquaremusic must be the next Jeff Bezos. You know, because only real businesses sell things that aren’t pre-loved. Never mind that the items were untouched, perfect gifts, or CDs that came with Autorip (remember that feature that no one asked for?). Clearly, this was a massive criminal operation that had to be stopped.
And so, Amazon demanded they register as a business, but our hero refused—because let’s be honest, lying to become a “business” is Amazon’s job, not theirs. After four attempts to reason with Amazon’s… shall we say, “completely helpful and totally not copy-paste” customer service team, they were met with silence. Just like yelling into the void, except the void occasionally sends you a link to the FAQ page.
tensquaremusic, with the grace of someone finally leaving an over-complicated Ikea relationship, decided to quit. Instead, they’ll make eBay and Discogs their new happy homes. And let’s be real, we’re all jealous. Imagine living in a world where your fees aren’t 90% of your sale price, and you aren’t required to pass an obstacle course just to ship an order.
tensquaremusic reflects on this newfound freedom like someone who’s just won the lottery—but instead of money, they’ve won back their Saturdays and Sundays, free of endless listing battles, category confusion, and soul-sucking support tickets. There’s a sense of bittersweet relief here, the kind that only comes from finally deleting that Amazon Seller Central bookmark.
What’s the takeaway from all this? Well, it’s clear that Amazon’s policies are designed to make sure no good deed—or “new” CD—goes unpunished. But, if we can learn anything from tensquaremusic, it’s this: Amazon isn’t just a selling platform; it’s a lifestyle. One filled with constant stress, random suspensions, and occasional moments of pure joy (usually when you receive a rare human response from support).
So, let’s all raise a glass to tensquaremusic, our fallen (but free) comrade. Enjoy your Saturdays, your eBay sales, and your newfound peace. And for the rest of us still trapped in the Amazon maze? Well, let’s just say, we’ll see you at the next forum meltdown.
User Comments
Climb_Europe1: “GGOD LUCK!!!!! Enjoy your peace. I have no idea what’s happening on this platform anymore.”
Belleana: “Enjoy your retirement!”
Jamie_Robertson: “Congrats. No selling fees on eBay for private sellers, so you’ll actually make money!”
